Ep 17 - Mean Girl
In this episode I talk about how I grew up in a society that saw self-confidence as bitchiness and self love as arrogance, how hearing myself talk about my experiences changed my relationship with myself and how whenever I'm being unkind to myself I try to figure out how I can show myself love.
I decided to spend a year working on myself. It was long overdue and I knew it was the only way I could heal and be present for my son. With loads of thought work, podcasts, therapy, meditation, self help books, yoga and (my favorite) life coaching, I started to peel back the layers. It turns out I really like who I am. There. I said it. But I grew up in a society that saw self-confidence as bitchiness and self love as arrogance.
And the more vocal I started to become about my experiences and I would hear myself tell these stories out loud about traumatic childhood events, gaslighting boyfriends and my husband’s suicide the more I started to have empathy for myself. Not pity. But compassion. I started to think holy shit I’ve been through a lot. No wonder I feel this way. No wonder I react to people and situations the way I do. No wonder I am the way I am. And that completely changed my relationship with myself.
I personally think everything that comes out of my life coach’s mouth is profound and life changing. But one of my favorite phrases that she uses is “ask yourself what love would do.” So whenever I’m being unkind to myself or the self-doubt starts creeping in, I try to think of what I need in that moment. I try to think of how I can support myself instead of shitting on myself for feeling the way I do. I try to figure out how I can show myself love.